What is a Maniac?
Some time ago, I was overwhelmed by how stressed I was feeling, how many deadlines loomed, and how much I needed to ground myself and meditate. But, I couldn’t get myself there. Why, you ask? Because the monkeys had control. I have The Meditation Pillow and everything. I understood perfectly that there’s nothing stopping me but me. The Pillow is still collecting dust in my front room, forlorn, lonely, neglected, but also a raging nag. That unused Pillow is a source of guilt. I must confess, I sort of hate The Pillow.
I concluded I couldn’t engage in a regular meditation practice because I’m a Maniac. And then I thought, if I’m a maniac, there must be a lot of other people like me that also have the best intentions, but just can’t get there. We just can’t seem to acquire the habit of expanded focus and time commitment that meditation requires.
According to Merriam Webster, a Maniac is a person who behaves in an uncontrolled way, and also is a person exhibiting extreme symptoms of wild behavior. Okay, so maybe not in the classic asylum kind of way, but many of us struggle with uncontrolled worry and thoughts. Does that ring a bell? Gong a gong? Bang a drum? So, I might be getting a little carried away (hence, the need for meditation), but you get my drift. I own up to being a Maniac. One hundred percent. Not arrogantly nor boastfully proud, but not sorry either. It just is what it is.
Are You a Maniac?
Are you often stressed out and easily distracted? Is it hard for you to settle in and settle down? Is mindfulness something you’re only vaguely aware of in theory but not in practice? Do you overthink and over worry about, well, everything? Do you have a mind that just will not shut off? If you answered yes to three or more of these questions, you just may be a Maniac. Welcome aboard.
So, What’s the Fix?
I realized at the same time that I discovered I was a Maniac that I really needed to develop a meditation technique for myself that was a quick, drive-thru approach. Think McDonalds of meditation versus the Four Seasons (Sorry, John Kabat-Zinn but we are who we are. No apologies). Meditation for Maniacs. That’s it! I had the proverbial “Ah Hah” moment. Meditation geared towards the Less than Zen.
Because we are a group of crazy risk takers, Green Ink Radio is developing an app called Meditation for Maniacs and it will provide targeted, short meditations for all types of occasions. Asshole boss? Meditation for a Challenging Boss. Bingo! In a traffic jam? Meditation (eyes open!) for Traffic Jams. Ba da boom! At dinner with a pompous bore? Meditation for Patience in Social Situations. Much calmer now. And while we love all the Zen mindful meditations out there, what about the real world situations we encounter on a daily basis? We need some guidance and relief from those circumstances as well as transcendence and actualization meditations.
No Lotus Position Required
The Meditations for Maniacs can be performed anywhere anytime. Of course we want you to self-actualize in addition to getting through life’s daily challenges, so those options are included in the app as well. Eventually, we will progress to longer and more mindfully based practices. For those that are already there, we will have a full library of options within the app for a deeper experience. However, our first goal is to help you get through the day in a more grounded, less emotionally laden way. And we’ll escort you through each step. You are no longer alone on a mindfulness island. We’ll captain your journey so you can relax and enjoy the ride. The meditations are only a few minutes in length, they’re guided, so no more having to figure out what to do, and you can easily fit them into your day. They are small slices of peace in our otherwise often chaotic world. Who doesn’t need that?
I bought access to a meditation app a while back, one that is very popular, and I was amazed by how expensive it was! So, Meditation for Maniacs will be far more affordable than other directive meditation apps. It will be great to develop a community of Maniacs meditating for the very first time! Then the second! And third! And twentieth! It takes 66 days to change a habit, so I am coming on the journey with you! Let’s shoot for 66 days together! Every meditation I write (I am certified in meditation—I know—the irony isn’t wasted on me, either.) and record, I too will do. There will be daily meditations as well as circumstance specific meditations.
The benefits of even a few minutes of meditation can last throughout the day by reducing heart rates, decreasing anxiety, increasing your quality of sleep, lessening tension headaches, lowering blood pressure, strengthening your immune system, reducing PMS symptoms, and improving airflow to your lungs. A more consistent practice will yield even greater results and is recommended to assist with traditional treatments of chronic illnesses and to increase your overall quality of life.
Tune in to Tune Up
The app is in production, so, in the meantime, for an introductory, quick and easy breathing meditation, tune into Green Ink Radio’s Spaz on Health Episode, Meditation for Maniacs. If you follow us on Facebook, the first 20 people who like us will receive the app free for one year. Please post in the Facebook comments that you would like the free app.
We are also looking for recommendations on what you would like to see included in the Meditation for Maniacs’ app. Please post your suggestions for development on this site. We will answer every post!
See you on The Pillow. Not! (Or not yet, at least).